HOW TO HANDLE EMOTIONS IN A HEALTHY WAY

Whatever you are doing right now, just pause for a while and look around. What do you see? You notice all gloomy and grumpy faces with burdensome expressions. Everyone is so occupied with his/her own mess that no one has time or space for your emotions! Who used to be your nearest and dearest friends once upon a time are either engrossed with respective family or are out of touch for years. So, when situations get overbearing, how to handle emotions in a healthy way without depending on anyone?

Here are 10 methods that I tried and tested, and which worked for me. I hope these will help you too.

1.Don’t run away from your emotions

Try to visualize structure of a molecule. What did you note? It is a stable balance of electrons and protons, right? Likewise, world is a handsome balance of positive and negative. If positivity is there, then negativity is bound to exist.

So once negative emotions like fear or anger or shame or sadness strikes in, don’t just try to deny or escape from it. Be true to yourself. Be aware of it and accept it. Acceptance of negative emotions is the inception of positivity.

2. Don’t allow someone to invalidate

At times there will be this person who will exclaim “You are too sensitive”, “you get upset so easily”. After-while you start questioning yourself.

We are human and not stones. If we lose a person dear to us, it will devastate us without any doubt. Suppose we are working hard towards our goal and get failure then naturally we would break down.

These feelings are humanistic. And our emotions are cent percent valid. These varied emotions make us a complete person after all.

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3.Find and avoid trigger

Have you heard those stories of a vicious devil, whose life was locked inside a bird ! Only way to end his life is to kill that bird.

My point here is, no matter how resilient a person maybe s/he always has a hidden weak side to him. The moment someone introduces a topic related to this weak aspect suddenly all terrible emotions rush inside brain.

So, one of the best tips for self-care is to identify that topic which triggers negatively into you. Avoid it and refrain from reacting to it as much as possible. Because good emotional health is a way to good mental health.

4.Identify a regular offender?

Let’s say someone throws an utterly negative comment on you. S/he says, “you are so ugly”, “you have a deformed body”, “you have zero knowledge”, “you are good for nothing”. Don’t get intimidated by such comments and never judge yourself because of these negative remarks. The foremost thing you should do here is find out intent of that person who is commenting.

Is the person your well-wisher who is saying this because s/he wants you to upgrade and do better? In that case look inward and bring prerequisite changes. But what if s/he is a regular offender?

So what is implied by regular offender? Suppose a person at workplace is making ugly and illogical comments on you day in and day out. His/her only intension is to pull your leg down and feel a sense of supremacy.

This habitual offender can be anywhere, starting from your close relative to even a family member. So, whenever any baseless remark from him/her you listen in future, remind yourself that this person is commenting on you because s/he is not complacent with his/her own life. Hence s/he doesn’t want you to grow. Let them suffer with their sickness of inferiority complex. You better keep moving ahead.

5. Remove clause

Some people be like let me get financial prosperity, physical fitness and success then I will be positive. But the thing is life will keep on imposing new struggles on us one after the other. Thus, remove all *terms and conditions. Perfect time never comes. Removing clause and conditions is one of the ways to lift your mood instantly

6. Utilize your negative emotions

Every emotion is imperative for survival. Negative emotions teach a great deal of things, if you closely observe.

Fear gives an idea that we are about to come out of comfort zone. Anger shows that we have so much of energy stored within. Frustration makes it clear that we need to innovate new ways, because current one is not working. Therefore, life would have been so static without these negative emotions. Knowing how to utilize and redirect negative emotions will actually enhance productivity of a person by manifold.

7. Reacting equally to all situations

You must be knowing this great saying introduced in Bhagwad Geeta.

“Sukho dukhe same krutwa , labha-labho jaya-jayo”

-Lord Shree Krishna

That means a person should respond equally to both good and bad experiences of life. Often people who get too elated when situations are in favor, will lose their mind completely if it no longer suits them.

So whenever things seem magical and dreamy, don’t just float with it and take your feet off ground. Stay put and grounded. Be practical. Because nothing here is everlasting.

8. Gratitude journal

If we have 1 reason to feel negative, there will be 99 other factors to feel positive. But problem occurs when we overthink and create an imaginary monster out of that 1% negation. On the other hand, we completely disregard what we have now.

Suppose tomorrow morning you get up to find that, whatever you had is all gone now! How does it feel? We are privileged to have those things in life which million others aspire to have but can’t access. So, make a gratitude list and jot down all the things you should be thankful for in life.

9.Stop blaming others for your emotions

I had this shoddy habit of blaming others for my emotions. But believe me ‘putting blame on others’ will do no good. Rather it will engulf you inside a black hole.

In due time I have learnt to take responsibility of my emotions. It was quite challenging in beginning to be honest. But then I realized that holding others responsible for my feelings is such a waste of time and energy. It is not helping me to get any closer to my goal 3-5 years down the line. Thus, I should be the one in authority of my emotions.

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10.Don’t compare and don’t get compared

I feel pity for those people who compare themselves to others. Social media addiction has set some unrealistic expectations of life. If presentation of a food is top-notch that doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s tasty too!

So stop comparing yourself to others. Also avoid comparing your kids to others’ kids. Basically, don’t weigh a person against any other person, because everyone has a unique set of 30,000 genes and has to face non-identical circumstances in life.

Conclusion

Everyone fantasizes himself/ herself to be hero of a movie. Each person sets boundary from person whom s/he theorize to be toxic. But have you introspected yourself? What if you are the villain? What if you have toxic trait which is repulsive to others!

Anyway, nothing is absolutely black or white and each thing falls into a grey zone. So, vibe in such a way that positive stories will meet you on your way.

So, what is your way of dealing with negative emotions? I would love to hear from your side. Share this post with friends and family by using social media share buttons below.

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